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THE VICTIMS
This Web Page is dedicated to the Victims of the Crime of Impaired Driving. If you or someone you know is a victim of this crime and you would like your story documented here, please contact MADD Durham.
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JAMES BAILEY |
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JACKI BEVAN |
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PATRICK BURNE |
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DON & BRYAN GAINER |
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EVA GAINER |
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MELISSA LANGWORTH |
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MIKE MURPHY |
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CATHY MILLSON |
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KIMBERLY ROSE |
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P.C. TERRY RYAN |
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THOMAS SOBINO |
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BRITTANY STOCKER |
JAMES BAILEY
James has twice been a victim of impaired driving himself, and then in Sept 2002 he lost a very dear friend to an impaired driver.
James has found the justice system to be very frustrating and continues to help fight impaired driving.
JACKI BEVAN
Jacki Bevan was hurt in an impaired driving crash.
PATRICK BURNE
On November 18, 1999, 25 year old Patrick Burne was killed instantly at the corners of Westney and Taunton Roads in Ajax, when a 4th time convicted drunk driver decided he was above the law...AGAIN. Returning from visiting his father in hospital, Patrick was hit by an oncoming vehicle being driven by a man with THREE times the legal limit of alcohol in his system.
Engaged to be married, Patrick's hopes and dreams and those of his fiancé, were instantly destroyed. He had a zest for life, loved horses and was dedicated to his parents. His sister feels the justice system let them down by allowing this man the freedom to drive. Never having gotten over the shock of his son's death, Patrick's father passed away in October 2001.
Patrick's mother recently attended a parole board hearing, where the offender having been sentenced to 66 months was released on day parole, after serving only part of the sentence. She continually fights against impaired driving.
DON & BRYAN GAINER
Eva's Story
By Darlene Rich
March 19, 2002
“We were a normal family. Not a perfect family but normal. Now we are dysfunctional.” - Eva Gainer, survivor.
On a sunny Sunday afternoon in July 2000, while returning from a weekend spent with friends at the cottage Don, Eva, Bryan Gainer and family friend Cathy Millson, were returning to the city. The older Gainer children Sara and James had spent the weekend with other family members and friends. On a two-lane highway near Sunderland, Ontario, fate was to merge the Gainer family van with Robert Bonefant’s pick-up truck and forever change their lives. But was it fate or the shear lack of a conscientious society to do something about a serious problem?
In the quiet sub-division on a cold February day in 2002, the house appears similar to those around it. But inside lies the memories and pain that make this home unique. Solid-oak French doors, closed as if preserving the contents inside, swing open as I step into ‘the memory room’. Here- time stands still. Sunlight cutting through the window illuminating the memorabilia creates a seemingly divine natural light and gives off an almost monolithic aura. Pictures, trophies, awards and trinkets of two victims fill the room with happy but sad memories.
This is the home of Eva Gainer, and her teenage children Sara and James. It was once a home where Eva’s husband Don and their son Bryan lived. But Don and Bryan don’t live here anymore, as a matter of fact; they don’t live at all- not in the bodily sense. In this house Don Gainer will always be 49 years old and Bryan will always be 11. Robert Bonefant made that decision one-day, a decision that wasn’t his to make, and shattered the lives of many people.
Eva remembers nothing that took place on the highway at the crash site only of passing through Orillia moments earlier. She first regains consciousness at St. Michael’s Hospital in Toronto, where she had been airlifted from the Port Perry local hospital. It is here where Eva’s sisters attempt, through shock and disbelief, to explain that her husband of 19 years and youngest child did not survive. Through her overpowering grief would she now have the strength to survive her own injuries? And if she did have that strength would she want to?
The Oxford dictionary defines ‘accident’ as 1. an unpleasant incident that happens unexpectedly, 2. an incident that happens by chance.
Two decent, honest, loving people are dead by no fault of their own, yes that is unpleasant. The ‘accident’ took place unexpectedly but was it by chance? The misuse of the word accident is blatant here. It was not by chance, it was preventable, and several people tried to no avail. Robert Bonefant had his drivers license revoked on Friday the 21 of July, two days earlier, that didn’t seem to prevent disaster either.
A friend of Bonefant’s, Catherine Caines, made not one but two 911 calls prior to the crash, to the Durham Regional Police. It was not placed as a priority call. A man, severely intoxicated, was about to drive from Oshawa to Sault Ste. Maire, Ontario. Sure. Doesn’t sound like a priority to me either.
The Gainer family has a civil suit pending and hopes to see changes made to emergency calls involving impaired driving.
Eva would spend six weeks in hospital and was not capable of attending the funerals of her husband and baby child. Family members would video tape it for her, care for Sara and James, make funeral arrangements, as well as look after Eva and her personal affairs. It was a long road back to what would be the ‘new normal’ life she and her surviving children would live.
Many people ask her if she is angry, “grief overshadows any anger I may have, the pain I live with is far too strong.” Instead Eva prefers to remember her husband, her life partner and all that he meant to her. The plans they had as they approached the years when most married couples start to re-connect after surviving the ‘baby’ days. What they planned for their retirement, things they wanted to still experience together. “Don is not here to help me make decisions I know he would have made.” Don was a teacher, a scout leader, coach, basketball and ball hockey player. He loved reading mystery novels, enjoyed skiing, camping, gardening and fixing up old cars. He was a good son, devoted husband and a good father. Don believed in God.
“It’s hard to grieve equally for both of them at the same time. Sometimes I think I am grieving too much for Bryan and other times for Don.” Bryan was an easy-going child with a comedian-like attitude and liked to imitate voices. Not being a strong academic achiever he more than made up for that with his athletic abilities. He was a tiny-but-mighty player in both hockey and soccer and was going to start dirt biking with his older brother James. With his friends he enjoyed simple things like playing Nintendo, swimming, fishing and camping.
Bryan’s classmates will be entering an exciting moment this fall as they begin high school - he didn’t get to turn 12.
Cathy Millson suffers from partial paralysis since the tragedy and can’t work or drive any longer. Before this happened she was about to take care of her parents as they entered the golden years. Now they take care of her. Funny isn’t it how we think we are in control of our own lives?
Sara and James lost their father and baby brother at a time when most kids worry about who they are going to date. As this writer knows too well, grief is a funny thing. It leaves you angry, sad, confused, and feeling ripped off. Sara won’t have her father walk her down the aisle when she gets married. James won’t have a father to go to for manly advice. Both will always wonder what, if given the opportunity, Bryan would have become. And all this WAS preventable, avoidable and needn’t to have happened, it was NOT an accident. Not by Oxford’s definition anyway.
As for Robert Bonefont he met with the ultimate judge that day in July. One who did more than take his driver’s licence away and made him pay what he owed.
The ‘new normal’ life for the Gainers will go on, as it must. But it doesn’t take a genius to figure out it will never be the same. This is NOT what they had planned, anymore than it is in your life plan.
Tell me now, you didn’t think once,…..Thank God it wasn’t me.
“You think the worst is that they are dead then you learn they stay dead.” - Eva Gainer.
MELISSA LANGWORTH
Melissa Langworth was a 26 year old school teacher when she became the victim of a drunk driver on March 12, 1999.
On that date, Melissa's car was "t-boned" by a drunk driver who failed to stop at a red light in Whitby. Melissa was taken to Sunnybrook Hospital where she spent the next four weeks in a coma.
Her injuries included 3 broken ribs, a punctured lung, a lacerated bladder, liver, and kidney, a fractured pelvis and tail bone, and head injuries.
Melissa was hospitalized at Sunnybrook for a total of five weeks, and was then transferred to West Park Rehabilitation Hospital for four weeks, where she had to relearn to walk and talk.
She continues to receive ongoing occupational and speech therapy, and three years later, remains unable to return to teaching.
While the drunk driver was sentenced to 15 months in jail for his crime, Melissa will have to live with the affects of her injuries for the rest of her life.
CATHY MILLSON
Cathy Millson was injured by an impaired driver.
MIKE MURPHY
Mike's father was killed by an impaired driver.
P.C. TERRY RYAN
In a devastating blow to the force, Terry Ryan, president of the Durham Regional Police Association, was killed in a head-on crash with a suspected drunk driver in north Whitby.
The 55-year-old association leader and police constable, who "gave his heart and soul" to the service, died during surgery Friday morning.
He leaves his wife, Carol, two sons, Kevin and Jamie, and three grandchildren.
Flags were lowered to half-mast outside police headquarters in Oshawa, while inside stations across Durham officers of all ranks expressed shock. A visibly shaken Chief Kevin McAlpine, who visited the crash scene late Thursday, said he was deeply saddened.
"We're all really devastated. Our folks are trying to get the work done,
just trying to get through the day," said Chief McAlpine, his voice breaking.
"He's going to be a big loss."
Mr. Ryan was traveling north on Lakeridge Road, returning to his Oakwood home after a police function in Pickering about 10:40 p.m., when "a suspected impaired driver crossed the centre line," Chief McAlpine said. The 1996 Pontiac Transport van, which was southbound, collided with Mr. Ryan's 1996 Toyota Camry, destroying both vehicles, police said.
The driver of the van, a 37-year-old man from Georgetown, suffered serious injuries and was taken to Ajax and Pickering Health Centre, where he was arrested for impaired driving, said Sergeant Paul Malik, police spokesman. His injuries were not considered life threatening.
He remained under police guard in hospital Friday and will face a charge of impaired driving causing death upon his release, Sgt. Malik said. In a twist, while police were at the scene investigating the collision, which occurred just south of Hwy. 7, an Ajax woman being spoken to as a "potential witness" was herself arrested for impaired driving, Sgt. Malik said.
He said investigation found she was traveling behind the van in a Pontiac Grand Prix and both were leaving a "social function" at a local golf club. Mr. Ryan was air-lifted to Sunnybrook Health Sciences Centre, where he died during surgery five hours later. Colleagues described Mr. Ryan's passion for policing as matched by few and said he was unwavering in support of the 900-plus uniform and civilian police personnel he represented.
"He fought tooth-and-nail for us. It's absolutely devastating. He literally gave his heart and soul to the job for 30 years, and he'll be sorely missed," said Staff Sergeant Bruce Townley. Mr. Ryan was in his third term as Durham association president and was current chairman of the Police Association of Ontario. His leadership was widely respected across the country, said PAO President Bob Baltin.
"The tragedy is compounded by the report that the driver of the other vehicle was arrested for impaired driving," he said.
An outspoken crime-fighting advocate, Mr. Ryan lobbied in the past for stiffer penalties for impaired driving, and quit drinking himself 25 years ago, friends said.
Durham Region Chairman Roger Anderson also expressed sorrow.
"Terry stood behind the men and women of the Durham Regional Police Service and represented them passionately for many years," he said.
"Terry's commitment... to police officers in our region...(and) officers across Ontario, will be greatly missed," said Mr. Anderson.
Mr. Ryan began his policing career in 1973 with the Pickering Police Department, which merged with other municipal forces in 1974.
He was a Durham police association director for the past two decades, served as vice president and was first elected as president in 1993.
In recent years, under his leadership, the association butted heads with police management, spearheading a vote of non-confidence in the police chief, leading to calls for the chief and board members to resign.
A bitter two-year contract dispute followed, leading to a settlement last summer. Since then, there has been a cease-fire in hostilities and colleagues say a "mutual respect" developed between Mr. Ryan and Chief McAlpine.
Association Vice-President Doug Cavanaugh, interim president until an election is held, said Mr. Ryan "left his mark" with the impressive contract he negotiated.
"Terry's cement feet kept us locked in and he was able to garner the support of all membership. This contract is the reason a lot of experienced officers from other forces like York, Toronto and Peel are coming to Durham.
"He set the benchmark. The void he leaves is indescribable," Mr. Cavanaugh said.
Mr. Ryan would often "shoot from the hip" and although "not everyone liked his style," he spoke his mind and treated all fairly, Mr. Cavanaugh said.
A full police funeral is being planned for Wednesday, June 5'th, 2002.
Stephen Shaw, Staff Writer
Durham Region News Network
infodurhamregion.com
June 2, 2002
A beautiful poem has been written in Terry's memory by Kim Hefferman. To view, please visit the Police Poems website.
THOMAS SOBINO
Thomas Sobino was injured by an impaired driver.
BRITTANY STOCKER
9 year old Brittany was involved in an alcohol related crash, when a neighbor who had been drinking drove her in his vehicle and crashed on the way home.
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